Happy, happy New Year!!! Welcome to 2016.
How was break? I hope you enjoyed yourself thoroughly.
I am happy to report that I did. I made good on my commitment toward fun, silliness and relaxation. There were lots of games, cocktails, laughs, gifts, quality family time, movies and food, food, food!!! It was brilliant.
I also made my roller skating outing a reality. It was ridiculously fun to be back at a cheesy rink skating round and round with some of my favorite people. The only thing missing was the 70’s Funk soundtrack. We will definitely be going back!
In this first blog of 2016, I don’t need to tell you about the futility of New Years resolutions. That’s old news.
Instead, let’s go another route and discuss some Anti-Resolutions. Lists aren’t usually my thing, but this time of year seems to demand something different.
Resolutions of what NOT to do this year
Be hard on yourself
Let it go. What’s done is done. Making yourself feel badly only makes it worse. If you are gentle with yourself for being human there is less likelihood of you doing it again. Think about what you would say to a friend or child. Give yourself that same compassion.
Give a damn what others think
People are going to love you. People are going to hate you. And none of it has anything to do with you. If you do what makes you happy you won’t even have time to think about other people–you’ll be too busy having a fulfilling life.
No situation has ever been ruined more easily than with cynicism and negativity. It’s energy being used solely to bring you and those around you down. Why would you do that? Negativity has never solved anything. Be the light. It’s much more fun.
Worrying is like praying for what you don’t want. Focus on what you DO want from the situation. You are making up a story either way, at least make one up that makes you feel good.
Compare yourself to others
You are the only person on the planet who can be you. So why would you want to be like anyone else? Be your magnificent self. 100% loud and proud, because you are amazing just as you are!
~”When you judge others, you don’t define them, you define yourself.” Wayne Dyer
Keep your opinion to yourself
Enough of going along to get along. No more keeping the peace or thinking that your thoughts and opinions don’t matter. They do. Use your voice to advocate for yourself. Say the hard things; it’s difficult to start but ultimately you will feel better about yourself and speaking your truth will become more natural.
Try to fix others
As easy as it is to see everything that everyone else should be doing, it is only an excuse to not be doing things in your own life. You can’t want for others. You can only change things for yourself. Focus where you can get results–your own life!
Be around negative and unhappy people
You have complete power over your own thinking and being positive as much as possible. But no matter how far you go towards this new you, there will be people who don’t come along. Some people are as committed to unhappiness as others are to life being good. It is ok to let these people go. Part kindly while wishing them the best and protecting your positive vibe. (For people that you are stuck with–hit that Discovery Session button in the upper right hand corner.)
Need to be right
Being right doesn’t make you the better person. Our culture has ingrained “winning” to mean that we are above or better than people who have “lost”. This is patently false and keeps us in an us versus them mentality that only serves to separate us as humans. It also keeps us on the defensive and jockeying for position almost all the time. I could write a book about this, but for the short version, ask yourself: Would I rather be right or would I rather be happy?
If you are able to let go of just one of these things in 2016 your life will be better for it. I used to do ALL of these things as a matter of habit–but no more.
And if you nodded your head all the way through the list but were silently screaming “but how Lorna, how???” –please hit the contact button in the upper right hand corner of this page to set up your complimentary Discovery Session. We will give you a roadmap for getting you from here to there.
And in case you are wondering, I also have a “What I Want” list for 2016. I sent it out earlier this week to past and present clients. If you are curious about what made that particular list, hit me up and I will be happy to share.
‘Til next week.
Happy New Year Hugs,
In order to change your life, you must first change your mind.