You know, I’ve been talking to a lot of women lately who are entering a new stage in life. Whether it is because they have left their corporate jobs, their kids are getting older or an empty nest looms, these women are thinking about their next chapter.
While this should be an exciting time for them, they express feeling a lot of pressure about what exactly they should be doing.
I think that one of the reasons that these women are not comfortable with where they find themselves is because everywhere they look they see headlines that scream:
~Follow your passion!
~Do what you love!
~Live a purposeful life!
~Turn your hobby into a career!
Do you feel bombarded or overwhelmed by messages like these too?
Maybe you aren’t in full fledged new chapter mode, but you still ponder what you could add to your life to feel more fulfilled.
Knowing that you are free to make choices for yourself and go after your dreams is different than actually doing it.
What if you can’t decipher your dreams? What if you don’t know what you want to do?
If you believe the messaging, it seems like we are all supposed to know what our passion is. We are supposed to know what we love, go after it with gusto and change the world.
But when your “thing” isn’t clear to you, you can end up feeling more pressure than passion. More stress than purpose.
You may feel like you don’t have any idea what the heck you are supposed to be doing and so you end up either doing nothing or following other people’s ideas for you.
And then you find yourself feeling worse than ever.
So what should you do?
Instead of getting swallowed up in needing to know all the answers, try taking a deep breath and zoning in on what your impulses are trying to tell you.
When I look back on what has brought me to my current endeavors, it was all about following impulse.
Even though my road was windy and bumpy, I was always doing something that interested me. Something that my impulse led me to. It didn’t always make sense, but as I look back now, it all fit into my ever growing puzzle.
And just to give you an idea, my road has included Professional Organizing, Personal Training, Wellness Coaching, Transformational Courses, Life Coaching, Writing, Leading Workshops, Group Classes and Essential Oils. Throughout I have been on a personal path of self discovery coupled with a deep study of metaphysics that I bring into all of my work.
Every step has been something that I had an impulse to try. Sometimes it felt like a nudge in a certain direction and other times it was a great big push. But I paid attention, accepted the guidance and kept moving.
I never asked “what is my passion?” Instead, it was always a question of “what will be fun and interesting?” Concentrating on that question kept me out of quicksand.
It is also clear to me now that I was involved in a process.
I couldn’t have gone from stay at home mom of five to Life Coach and Writer overnight. There were steps that needed to be taken.
Some were action steps, but many were mental steps. There was a process around getting comfortable with this new aspect of my identity. And it took time.
So definitely follow your impulse, but also trust the process. Try your best to be ok with wherever you are.
Here are some examples of impulses that might be trying to nudge you somewhere:
If you have been wanting to take a class–sign up.
If you have been waiting to learn a skill–now’s the time.
If there is a place that you feel drawn to with your whole being–book a ticket.
If you have been dreaming about skydiving or rock climbing–go.
If you know you have something that the world needs–start offering it to others.
Those dreams and wants are your impulses. They are hints and clues as to what will ultimately fulfill you. They are your higher self giving you inside information.
You will be led somewhere if you give yourself permission to get on board. You will rarely know where you are headed, but if you are having fun and enjoying yourself, you won’t mind.
So trust your impulse. If you keep coming back to something in your mind, if you are drawn to it or feel like you just have to do it even though it makes no sense–there is a reason.
Try to drop the passion and purpose languaging. Doing that will allow you to embrace your impulses, appreciate where you are and enjoy the ride.
Here’s to new chapters.
In order to change your life, you must first change your mind.